As we were heading back to the cars, I was in the back of the pack and heard a noise in the woods. Suddenly, a 7 ft Sasquatch jumped out of the woods and attacked me (presumably for my high end schwinn bike). I immediately remembered my MMA training and laid the stone-cold Stunner on the Sasquatch. The sasquatch kicked out of my pin attempt and knocked off my glasses. This rendered my temporarily blind and my foe ran back into the woods knowing it had chosen a superior opponent.
Unfortunately, I lost a lense out of my glasses. If I had only had taken a picture…